Random Thoughts

A picture.....

A blog with a picture. For some reason that feels right. I love getting a glimpse into other people's world through their blogs and pictures. So I share a bit of my world in picture and words too. This picture is of Shawn and our yearly Christmas tree (Ina). We went the Saturday after Thanksgiving. The day was beautiful, sunny, and warm. The hunt for the perfect tree was interesting. And we found this perfect, shaggy, fat tree. She looks beautiful all dolled up in our ornaments and lights.

Acknowledgement....

During most holidays we end up with oodles of extended family drama in one form or another. This year is no different. We have a double whammy this year because there is drama on both sides of our extended families. It seems the when you get to the bottom line, we live a different lifesyle than most of our family members. They feel insecure next to this lifestlye at times and then point the finger at everyone but themselves and their insecurities. Usually I am knowing and accept how my side of the family is and Shawn doesn't want to deal with that drama so he opts out. This year with the drama on his side of the family I am suposed to go into the lions cave and deal with it because 'it is Christmas". This year when I pointed out his double standard he acknowledged it...... wow. Sometimes the acknowledgment is all that is needed. It isn't about who is right and who is wrong. It isn't about changing things you cannot control. It is about acknowledging the person speaking to you without patronizing them.

Merry Christmas....

I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. I hope that people will be able to realize the spirit of Christmas is inside of them and that things will only be as good or as bad as they make them. I personally will be making mine a good one. We work too hard to have the holidays ruined by jealousy, insucurities, or .... drama.

Hug and happies.

m

Ahhhh..... finding beauty.

Isn't it really about just opening up your mind to find the beauty?

I've worked the past few days and am kind of tired.

Usually when I am tired, I am crabby, and when I am crabby it is oh-so easy to find the BLECK in life.

However, all a person needs to do is open up their mind to find the beauty.

Also having an incredible support system (my created family) helps.

In scrapbooking news....

Tim Holtz is releasing some new distress inks. Yummy!!

I am addicted to watching artsy how-to videos.

They cuddle my creative soul with happiness and inspires me to create.

I actually finished (might have said this earlier) a few pages that have been on my desk forever and started a few more.

I am finding i work best in the 'kitchen sink' style. And I am working on letting go of perfection because it just isn't going to happen the way I think it should and that is perfectly OK!

In my head.....

I was walking into work Saturday night and I saw the signs for the ER physicians had been changed to say ED Physicians... with a marker!! The R had been written over with a black marker to make a D. This made me think A.) tacky!! B.) how I am seeing a change in culture. Back in the day is was Emergency Room because it literally was one room. Now the name is evolving into Emergency Department because it has become a catch all in the medical world. No longer is an emergency room a one room place... it is a melding pot of every imaginable medical issue ever known to man (and then some). I think though that the ED-ER change will take a while. Who would seriously know I was going to work in the emergency room if I write "ED here I come" or "a night of work in the ED" - not counting the peeps who actually KNOW I work in the emergency room.

I really REALLY do not want to go to the dentist.

What I have been doing....

Reading Eat Pray Love and Harry Potter (book 1).

Made my first set of prayer beads.

Working in the ED (hehehehe).

Spending too much money for Christmas and trying really hard to find the meaning but failing miserably.

Now I am off to go do.

Hugs and happies.

m

Random List

1. A Moore jump photo. This is how we are most days... together, full of life, and happy. I am totally going to have to do a page with the jump photos through the years.
2. I am currently reading Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. It is a book I have had for quite a while because I heard it was really good but never quite got around to reading it. I have been missing out! Also on my reading list is the Harry Potter series. Is that strange? I am reading them with Mason. That is my reasoning but I really just want to see what happens to Mr. Harry Potter.
3. Will be making THE dentist appointment tomorrow and already anxiety tightens my chest. I wonder why this happens? Why I wait so long, even when I know it isn't good?? Sigh.......
4. Work the weekend. Friday. Saturday. Sunday. Looking forward to the paycheck but not the time away from the family.
5.  Am so totally bummed that I will be missing the season finale of Survivior because I am covering someones shift for them. Dangit! Just hoping Russel gets the BIG BOOT!!!
6. My creative soul has been used again..... feels so good. When I finish this whole nursing thing I will totally be teaching artsy/scrapbooking stuff again. There is just something about art (in ANY form) that does a spirit good.

Speaking of creative spirit..... I am off to do something artsy!

Hugs and happies.

m

Why Worry?

By nature I am a worrier.
I wish I was a warrior.
Even when I try not to worry,
it is there.
Sometimes it is soothing.
Sometimes it steals my breath.
Sometimes the worry is there to remind me
to be cautious,
to appreciate that which is important.

As my journey gets chaotic I must make an effort to lessen the worry and to have faith.
Faith in that which I cannot control and faith in my loved ones who are always be my side...even when I don't see them.

So I am blogging my worries and then sending them into cyberspace.
Kind of like writing them on a piece of paper and ripping it up to let them go... but in a new age way.

1. Bai and the doctor's apt.
2. My mom and her broken leg.
3. My hubby and his unseeing family.
4. Time management.
5. Money.
6. Finding the right dentist.
7. Extended family drama.

Rip Rip.... RIP.
m

Been Thinking

I haven't been around in, oh.... over SIX MONTHS!
Well, I have been around but just not balancing life well.
Almost done with nursing school.
Needing to connect with people because I feel like I am missing.
Wondering if there is anyone out there feeling the same.
Thinking I must be the change I want to see.....
Hugs and Happies.
m

Holy Heck.....

It has been almost 2 months since my last blog.
Holy Heck!
I keep going back and forth about continuing my blog.
For now I am just going to leave it and see how things work out.
To catch up a bit, here is what has been and is going on in my little world.... in list form :O)

1. I finished my first year of nursing school. It really kicked my butt. Let me tell you nursing school around these parts are not for the weak!

2. Currently I am on a mini break until Monday when my 8 week summer class starts....uggghhh! I keep on pushing through. Two semesters after the summer and I will have my RN.... WHOOO HOOO!

3. Shawn is growing out his goatee again.... BLECK! I really don't like it on him at all but he insists. Sigh. It's a good thing I love this guy! 4. Baily is in her last week of being a freshman. Both her and Mason are totally ready for summer. Actually (with the exception of my 8 week class) we all are ready for the lazy days of summer. Yesterday we had a torrential down pour and Bai went out in the rain. You should have seen her dancing out there....She is such an amazing girl.

5. My intense little man...... Things keep changing for him, for us. He pulled through this school year but sometimes I just worry so much about him. He is such a sensitive guy and so intense. I will admit that alot of the time it is just exhausting! But he is my sunshine and totally is worth all the blood, sweat, and tears. He makes a good monkey face too, right?!

6. I am a week and one day into the new and improved me. This September I have my first dress fitting for a wedding I will be in and I have just reached a point where I am done being frumpy. I know, I've said it before and have tried to lose those pesky pounds before....heck I have lost and gained the same 5-8 pounds for almost 2 years now. But this time I am dropping the weight...not losing it (because I don't want to find it!) and I am doing what my body needs the most.....exercise! Yep, that is was makes me feel good and looks good.....too bad it is so much work, LOL!

Gotta go get Little Man.

Hugs and Happies!
m

It is what you say it is.

I'm with Leah...
Kind of in a funk lately.
Not really in a bad way.
More of a lazy, burnt up kind of funk.
I will be thankful when my nursing school days are behind me.

Some random.....
1. Missed blogging a HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my lil' guy (although I did Facebook it). Mason turned 10 on March 22nd. TEN!!! My baby is in double digits...sigh. Haven't been taking too many pictures lately but when I am able to capture Mason on film...this is usually what he is doing. Moving. Laughing. Making a face.

Mason said the other day as he was looking into the mirror;
"MOM! Did you know I have freckles??!!" Pointing to his nose
Me "ummm, yeah. I love your freckles!"
Mason "well I don't! I just want to wash them off"
I found it funny that he is soo NOT vain he is just now realizing he has freckles on his nose. Love his freckled nose!
2. It snowed here the night before last. We woke up to 5 inches. Thankfully it is all pretty much gone but wowza....talk about throwing me out of whack! I am just about ready for spring to be here with my toe nails painted and new flip flops purchased.

3. Found these pictures of Bai and Shawn on my camera and was totally laughing. (I was helping with the carnival games prizes for the family fun night or I would have had a picture or two in here) What I think the funniest is how scary Shawn can look. He really is so laid back and non aggressive (most of the time) yet he can look so stinkin' tough. We are going to use that mean look for Bai's "boyfriends".

4. Nursing school is sucking the life out of me!

5. I have bills to pay, a sink full of dishes, laundry out the wazoo, a MOUND of unfinished projects with good intentions, and a list of homework to work on tonight but I don't care right now. Right now I am blogging, catching up, drinking coffee and happy that "Chuck" is on the boob tube tonight.

6. I need to take more time to be aware of all that I am blessed with.

Going to go dance like a maniac for the next 15 minutes then start working on my list. Seriously, try the dancing thing...just turn on a good song and rock out!

Hugs and happies.

m